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Be A Freak

Be A Freak

I’m sure you saw the word freak and instantly became interested in what this article could possibly be about.  It’s about how to function in a dating world without completely creeping someone out within the first few days, weeks or even months.  It’s all about keeping a steady pace and saying the right things at the appropriate times.

Let’s take a look at a friend of mine who has good intentions but is approaching every possible dating scenario the wrong way.

1)   He says I love you or I think I love in a matter of days
2)   He tries to date guys who are younger than him and therefore not looking for the same things in life
3)   He frequently cries (everywhere) when the new boyfriend is not attentive enough
4)   He tells his boyfriend and friends how unhappy he is when not finding the perfect guy
5)   He’s never happy with himself

When you’re a bachelor on the market and looking for love, you have to make sure you pace yourself and your approach to the new relationship.  You also need to make sure you are happy with yourself before looking for a boyfriend.  If you’re unhappy with who you are, there’s no man in the world that is going to make it go away or make things better.  If you hate your weight, your job, or your direction in life, you’ve got to fix these things.  Don’t sit around and expect for some prince charming to come in and fix you or put up with your baggage!

Don’t date guys with limited experience if you’re trying to find a long-term relationship.  I don’t know why people constantly think they will be the one to win in this scenario!  If you’re 25 or older and dating someone who is 18 to 21 you are basically riding the waves of pending disaster.  The reason is that you’re in two different stages of life and will continue to be for a few years to come.  At 25 you may be starting to settle into your career, a house and maybe considering starting a family.  At 18, you’re just getting out of high school, trying to decide what you want to do with your life, and you have the popular age 21 coming up.  If you’re in your 20’s and beyond, you remember what turning 21 is like, which baffles me as to why you’d want to date someone getting ready to go through that stage of life.  I know, I know, you like the young look, the hard abs, and the stamina of your young stallion.  Use your brain this time and realize it’s a pending scenario of doom, but feel free to toss the dice.

Last but not least, don’t drive your friends insane with your dating drama because you keep going against their advice and picking the worst possible boyfriend every single time.  The first few times your friends will be patient and supportive as they try to help you through your mishap and boyfriend tragedy.  Trust me, if you keep making the same choices and mistakes they will not hesitate to start distancing themselves from you and your pity party.

Your mission is to be happy with yourself and who you are, date someone your own age, don’t get too clingy too quick, don’t throw around the word love too soon, and take the advice from your friends to heart; they’re not stupid or you wouldn’t be friends, hopefully.

Photo by Warm Orange on Unsplash

Jeans

Jeans

Content Warning – Explicit Lyrics

You can show me that butt
You don’t have to be my slut
Just a little exposure of that ass
Don’t give me no fuckin’ sass

That ass, those jeans
Let me see inside them things
You walk, you strut
Wiggle and shake that butt
I wanna touch, wanna touch
I just can’t get enough

Thick and round boy
It’s about to go down boy
Go down, go down, that’s what I’ll do
Bend you over and fuck you
Damn you thick though
Call me papacito

That ass, those jeans
Let me see inside them things
You walk, you strut
Wiggle and shake that butt
I wanna touch, wanna touch
I just can’t get enough

Sit on your face?
Yah, I’ll make a case
It’s about to get real sick
When I start to eat that dick

Nibble nibble
Make you dribble
I don’t have dentures
But you’ll wish I did
Now shut the fuck up and give me your kids

That ass, those jeans
Let me see inside them things
You walk, you strut
Wiggle and shake that butt
I wanna touch, wanna touch
I just can’t get enough

Depression

Depression

Night rolls in and I’m always awake
I’m ok with the Lord, my soul to take
Legs on fire and full of movement
So lonely, one person ruined it

I’m empty and sad
Loss of interest in everything
Except being a Dad

Anxiety has a strangle hold on my soul
I have trouble remember things
This shit gets old

All I do is eat and pack on the pounds
Who the fuck wants the doughboy walking around?

Tearfulness, emptiness
Pacing all day from restlessness
I don’t need my life to be the same
But I do want to feel sane

Cramps in my back and thighs
Let me know that I’m alive
There is no shame as I feel the pain
Maybe I’m really going insane?

Photo by Damir Samatkulov on Unsplash